If I could save time in a bottle

I lay my head on my pillow after a long day and for some reason, I cant sleep. Ever since my sister was hospitalized, I don't sleep, I go to bed about 2 am, get up around 7 am.

All day I have been repeating the first line to Time in a Bottle...there is always a reason. Here are the lyrics below. I thought about just posting a link for you to just go to, to shorten my blog post, but you have to see these lyrics. As I took some time to reflect on them, as well as research what this song meant to Jim Croce. You have to know two things...he wrote this song for his un-born son and he died in a plane crash at the age of 30 shortly after it released and he never got to see his son grow up.

If I could save time in a bottle
The first thing that I'd like to do
Is to save every day
Till Eternity passes away
Just to spend them with you

If I could make days last forever
If words could make wishes come true
I'd save every day like a treasure and then,
Again, I would spend them with you

But there never seems to be enough time
To do the things you want to do
Once you find them
I've looked around enough to know
That you're the one I want to go
Through time with

If I had a box just for wishes
And dreams that had never come true
The box would be empty
Except for the memory
Of how they were answered by you

But there never seems to be enough time
To do the things you want to do
Once you find them
I've looked around enough to know
That you're the one I want to go
Through time with

I never just think anything happens randomly anymore, do you? Have you thought about the 'strangers' you meet? The friends you have? The circumstances you are in? We could be in a different country, be a different race, have gone through a different era, had different parents, different sisters/brothers, had a completely different income...wealth, poverty, status, education, structure, home life, sex and language.

I recently did a special project with my kids and for myself. I created a Inspirational Collage http://whiteheadmarshall.blogspot.com/2011/05/inspirational-collage.html, something to keep me focused on the goals I once had and wish to keep working towards.

It seems in my life right now, I need that sort of structure and balance. I feel lost right now. I am seeking God's truth. I passionately desire change, craving to know and do what I was called to do. I am more aware of how precious our time is here on Earth. I want to make the positive right changes to be productive and take full advantage of those precious... minutes, hours and days I still remain here on Earth.

I want to show my kids that you can do anything and not to just stop because of our circumstances or where we are placed. Our wealth, poverty, education, structure, home life, sex and language don't have to determine where we go. We just need to follow the marked path and hang on for the ride...those circumstances could change and you could be gone even when you didn't think it would happen to you. I can't just let life go on the way it has been going on anymore. I need to do something, I need to be a servant to Jesus every single day and let his path for my life light the way.